In some ways, I still believe there is no sequel to Terminator 2: Judgment Day. The action-packed, sci-if sequel to James Cameron’s The Terminator.

What really bothers me, what explicitly, forcibly bothers me is seeing some of Terminator 3 lately on HBO and learning the plot of the movie (along with the outcome)… In plot and scope – it’s a good sequel and could have been outstanding as a movie. In dialog? In direction? Horrendous, absolutely horrendous.

I don’t know if they were trying specifically to separate this Terminator from the previous 2 models that visited the past in the first movies…. But you could see Arnold Schwarzenegger was too stiff for his role (even though going stiff was part of the role). His deliveries are too quick, and certain tag lines from the movie aren’t inserted when they actually need to be inserted (“Come with me if you want to live,” dense computer-like talk, and of course the killer –” “I’ll be back.”). They’re as much a part of the franchise, I think, as Arnold as a Terminator.

Ridiculousness kills this movie as well. What is the T-X? A woman liquid-metal model that can make complex machines as weapons? That’s lame.. . Why do I say that? Because Robert Patrick scared the shit out of me as the T-1000 that could run incredible speeds, overcome being shot by most weapons, and stab the shit out of whoever the intended target is. This Termistress just doesn’t do it for me.

Skynet not being a central computer but every computer connected to the Internet — that was a stroke of genius which gave a good premise for the film.. But it utterly fails with corniness and just sheer corruption from the other two movies. James Cameron is the master of the Terminator universe – and this is sadly no James Cameron film, and it is clearly evident.

The thing that sucks the most about living in Palm Harbor is not the fact that this neighborhood is “the boonies” when it comes to having my friends come over (it’s far removed from Tampa, St. Pete and other areas, or so it seems) but the fact that I am living amid Republican Hell. I can see it in the local politics but I can also see it with Fundrace 2004. Half of the entires posted were backing George W. Bush while the other half was backing Howard Dean.

I don’t know how often this thing is updated and I am not listed even though I have made a few contributions to a candidate thus far… But interesting none the less

Oh Deer has a couple of meanings to it as the title to this entry…

At first, I’ll give you the literal interpertation – A deer rand through my neighborhood. NOw, for those of you out in the country or who have lived in the country or areas where woods are plentiful – deer sightings are more common. Personally, I haven’t seen a deer since I lived up on Long Island. I see deer signs near Booker Creek preserve here in North Pinellas, but never have I seen anything around Lake St. George that would suggest there would be this kind of wildlife around.

Gopher Tortises, sure… Aligators? Totally — Eric had one in his backyard once, as had many others in the neighborhood. Snakes? Plenty. But deer? Never. I’ve lived here 14 years and never has the possibility of a deer in the area seemed like a possibility.

Too much developement, too many people, not enough space to roam.

But my mom saw one run down our street. How the hell it got to Lake St. George, I don’t know. If it’ll survive until it’s trapped and moved to a safer location – I don’t know at all.

The other part of “Oh Deer” is the “Oh Dear” part. It’s been six weeks since I saw Doc Smith and I was at his office today. We spoke candidly towards each other — I told him I was fading and he told me that i would likely have a long recupperation in front of me after surgery — including a stay at a rehabilitation center.

It’s troubling. Un-nervving – pun not intended but recognized.

So next Wednesday, I am supposed to go under the knife – the day before Thanksgiving. I’m really sorta taken aback but at the same time, I recognize the fact I got to get this shit done — now. While u are eating your turkey or with your family, I’m going to be lying in a hospital bed.

…With no guarantee that I will take to my feet under my own power again.

Oh you gotta love this shit…

CNN.com – Girls pummel man who exposed himself – Oct. 31, 2003

PHILADELPHIA, Pennsylvania (Reuters) — A man described by authorities as a known sexual predator was chased through the streets of South Philadelphia by an angry crowd of Catholic high school girls, who kicked and punched him after he was tackled by neighbors, police said Friday.

Catholic School Girls Gone Wild!!!! Kicking ass and taking names at a video store near you! Content is kid safe because, damnit, the Pope and the nuns at school wouldn’t look forward to it being any other way! :biggrin

Seriously though – i knew girls who had crazy bastards do this to them before – flash them and what not — and I like seeing a sexual predator like this get is come-uppance

There was a lot in this dream and a lot I can’t remember now. Most of the images don’t stand out in my head any more but I know when I dreamed there was a plot and a point to things. Everything made sense at the time, as dreams normally do, and even though random strange events came into being – things turned out OK.

I remember Pepsi. Having a glass while talking with my mom… I remember getting the mail with my mailbox in the back yard, and there being a ton of mail to bring in. I remember the family cars being different and having some strange abilities to them. Well, not strange abilities to them, but the trunks were different. They were funky and 4-doors themselves.

It was my neighbor from across the street who stands out in the dream — who it turned out to be and what was going on. It was a special day for her and for some reason there were two of them in that house: one was a newborn infant that was being tended to by her mother while the other that I dealt with was a kid… a little kid that claimed she was 12 but was obviously a lot younger than that. She talked but barely listened. Preached but couldn’t comprehend when told something.

I can’t remember much more to the dream… what else happened before me waking up…. But it was a very vivid dream at the time. Feelings evoked and images shown and the like….

So anyway, I’ve got therapy in a little while… My left leg has been really weak lately while my right is very strong. Strange It’s a role reversal. It was vice versa in the hospital and in the last few weeks.

One last note — Mike gave me Reloaded last night and i have to agree with Merovingian: The French language is like wiping your ass with silk… it just flows and caresses…

Bill Erickson’s niece, Emma Christine (don’t know her last name) was born around 1 PM EDT this afternoon. I don’t know all the stats but I will post them when I have them.

An hour later, my neighbor since I moved into my current residence, Mila, passed away at 83… She’s been through some real hardships the last 14 years and plenty more before we ever moved in. It will be strange living in a world without her

I’ve just found out my Aunt will be on MSNBC on December 4th… Certainly something I would like others to see but as far as I know, things will fall apart worse before then…

This goes without saying a lot about me – as I would think that most of my journal entries have lately — they’ve made brief mentions about things going on on the Internet or perchance other opinions I have but not really talked about me. It’s assumed that I am doing fine if anyone at all is wondering how I am doing. Certainly my writing is a little more to-the-point yet short and meaningless if you really think about it. There have been a few cases where my posts have had a meaning and those who needed to know the meaning got it, unfortunately it just continued to put things in a bad light because I let emotions get to me by posting that in the first place…

At any rate, what is new with me? Besides writing, there isn’t much. I saw Doc Smith this morning and had a wheel chair prescribed to me. I’ve also had my mother bullshit me with regards to moving downstairs — into the windowless living room of the house and having an “apartment” int eh home. Why are we talking this? Because I need another operation and scheduling it is only being put off by my worries of life without legs/being wheelchair bound until further notice.

I started talking about moving out — It’d be simpler than the bullshit idea of converting a dark room into a bedroom apartment.

Personally I am right back where I was in… say, April and May 2002 when it comes to dealing with people I meet on line — they all turn out to be shallow. You might make someone laugh but they will ditch you if they see a picture they don’t like.

*sigh* Memories from the corner of my mind – when that stuff didn’t matter with a few people I met on here..

Emma Christine’s birthday present looks more and more like a Buccaneer win… Reminding me of something that happened 24 years ago tomorrow with the Giants beating the 5-0 Bucs (my father is a Giants fan). Wonder what tomorrow has in store for me if anything? Besides a Total Recall….

I’m going to give you folks (my readers) a little chance to read a piece of that story (32 pages) that I am writing. if you’re interested in more – please say so… Click on the below link to check out the lead to the story.
(more…)

You’re conceived. When you’re born, you come to be, as it’s known. You come into the world. You come into your family and your journey through life begins. That’s the start of the comings of life.

You come into a lot of things and as you progress in life, mature, you start coming with things. Yes, that’s the sex reference there. Your life becomes the coming – the desire to come with another. Of course there’s more TOO life than that, I am just using it as a reference.

And you end up letting someone else come into the world through this. Your desire, that primal urge to copulate equals more comings than goings.

That brings up death and what I have a problem with – if your life is guided by the comings – or pushed ahead on the comings – who can say that we “go” to someplace with death? “You’re going to heaven because you’ve been true to yourself, you didn’t lie, steal, cheat or kill and it’s all good.” “You rotten bastard, you’re going to hell! All you’ve ever done is lie to me!”

You could phrase death as things “Coming to a close” but coming to a close doesn’t give you the perception that there is anything more after it. You could be coming to an apex of your being that goes beyond what we know and what we don’t… Or, there might be some other coming that we don’t even comprehend – that our minds are too feeble to comprehend.

All of this inspired by a video on HBO where a son told his mother, “You go be with Jesus now…” It didn’t sound right to me, It didn’t feel right to me…. Go to it, go away from it, go be part of it… There are so many times we try to GO and fail… And yet when we COME – it’s only success. Surely there are more examples of comings in life as opposed to goings…?

So what have I done the past four days in my house? Just about everything…. Alone at that.

In fact I went and put on a pot of coffee for my parents about the time their flight got in. You know, Mr. Nice Guy and stuff like that. I would never do some shit like this if I wasn’t craving attention in some way. How was I thanked? I think I got 10 words total out of both my parents when I talked to them. Oh, they could give me the rub that they were tired — or someone else might make that case with me – but they sure as shit had a lot to talk about with my older brother. They weren’t as dismissive or non-inquiring about things.

And what about John?

Lets see, I’m using a WALKER to keep my balance at times around the house, I can’t just leave the house… I’ve been stuck here with someone who believed I couldn’t handle shit in the house alone and yet he was also someone who wouldn’t bother trying to talk to me much — if at all — the entire time.

To say the least, I’ve been lonely. I’m still lonely… I don’t know how the hell I am going to get through the next few weeks in the hospital feeling like this, because it’s not like I’m going to have people stopping by much.

I’m lost. Plain and simple, I am lost.

Sometimes it gets to the point where you break over the slightest things. The sameness flowing around you, the lack of variation from the norm… Or maybe even the norm makes you ill to your stomach and makes you want to toss your cookies.

I’m at that point right now.

I’ve been sick of my father the last few weeks but then again, my mom isn’t that much better than dear-old-dad. I’m tired of her habits. I’m tired of his habits. I’m tired of this house and of this room… I’m tired of this neighborhood and the suburbs in general.

I’m tired of the word “Liberal” being used like a 4 letter word in society. I’m tired of tattoos and body piercings being stuck on everything and everyone (can someone please tell the cute girls that natural skin is sexy? Please?). I’m tired of Florida, where education and infrastructure mean next to nil to the government and somehow it gets elected again and again. I’m tired of the fact I have to have social hour on the computer because my social skills are lacking with my poor-ass hearing situation offline.

I’m tired of feeling so boxed in.

Yet the answers aren’t aparent or aren’t coming into view very easily on how to deal with this mess and where to go to solve these quesitons. I don’t have the money to move, I don’t have a job. I don’t know where to look for a job that doesn’t necessitate phone skills or driving.. You can pray only so much until it gets to the point it feels like God is laughing at you and snickering while you are pleading to him.

Things were a lot better when there was someone else that I felt I shared things with. Now there’s no one to share things — emotions, thoughts, frustrations, dreams, etc — with.

I need help.