The conversation closed and the good Lord only knows
When I’ll speak with you again
You’re leaving today, winging ‘way on a plane
And I’ve lost you again today

We’ve known each other for quite a few years,
Shared our laughter, anger and tears
We’re lovers of past
Friends of today
Yet something’s been missing in things we say

I lost you once when you needed space
I lost you twice when you moved away
I’ve lost you to another man
Now I’m losing you to a foreign land

But away, you’ve gotta go
The life you chose is the life you know
And your life’s heading in another direction
We’d only crossed at an intersection
Each time you’ve gone, you’ve come back to me
And I hope that’s how it’ll always be

I know you’re happy with the plan:
You’re path in life, your future, your man
But something in me’s been gone a long, long time
The joy you bring and the way you can–
Fill me up with hope and glee
Honey, you’ve always completed me
But the time grows short and the rhyme grows long
I look again and now you’re gone

You’re on your way, with part of me
It seems that you have some secret key
You unlock my smiles and my zany side
Ignite my passions and calm my mind
But you’re not mine — yet you’ll always be
I’ve lost you again, you’re flying free
I’ve lost you again, as you glide ‘cross the sea

© 2005 John Fontana

Enchant me
Rise up over me and engulf me
Through your sensuality and softness
With your intellect and your persona
Show me the reason to care again
And give me a reason to want

Entrance me
Captivate me so I
Can think of nothing other than
Your very existence while
The world spins its uncontrollable revolutions
Leaving each man to cope with its maelstrom

Intoxicate me
Make me wish for nothing more than your
Warm and unblemished flesh
Held close against me
Where desire takes us into the
Unfamiliar territories
Of bliss and contentment

Save me
Find my cynical and sarcastic person
And convince him there is still good in the world
Simply by being yourself
Simply by pointing out in your everything
That not all is corrupt and lost to lust
Lost to insanity
Lost to the malice mankind unleashes on itself

Teach me to love again
Be my purpose in life
The purpose being having and holding you
Wanting and loving you
Supporting and caring for you
Until the sun sets on this world

© 2005 John Fontana

If it’s all the same to you
I’m gonna’ talk a while
See where the rhythm leads me
Or if I can forget your smile

If it’s all the same to you
I feel left for dead
Solitary Avenues
ANd a cold, lonely bed

If it’s all the same to you
I think I’ll hate the world
Where you’ve gone, loved, lived, moved on
And I can’t find another girl

If it’s all the same to you
I’ll cry myself to sleep
Self-esteem is running low
And shallowness reigns supreme.

© 2005 John Fontana

Flippign around the boob-tube, I’ve seen the new Ameriquest commercials featuring Mick Jagger and the Rolling Stones… I sigh and contemplate that there is another sell-out rock group, conforming with the Man to make money.

Well, conforming only a little bit.

When you think of politics and British rock, you think of the Beatles and there mantra of Peace and Love and all that jazz (and John and Yoko telling us the War Is Over — if you want it), or Radiohead for that matter… You don’t think of the Stones, do you?

Enter Sweet Neo Con

I haven’t heard the song yet or read all the lyrics except for the stuff in the news but I am itching to see what Mick and Keith are up to in this number….I don’t get like that with most protest songs…

The Dog is supposed to be six weeks old today. I haven’t seen a picture yet. I haven’t heard much of anything at all. I’m eager to hear and at the same time – I’m hearing nothing.

There was a dog I was told about by Jenna before I met Kerrie Kuper, this dog was in Orlando – another Whippet – and the his family was considering moving into a place where no dogs would be allowed. They loved Rip, but they would have to give him up… Or not. Jenna kept me informed about Rip’s status and as it turned out – Rip wasn’t going anywhere…. Supposedly.

Yesterday I found out that he was given away to someone in St. Petersburg, some time ago. I got to see his picture and I got to get angry because I missed out on my opportunity to already have a dog instead of waiting… Waiting in ignorance…. Waiting anxiously. Waiting…

So I’m sitting down, watching the opening minutes of House last night on FOX and end up going hysterical over the fact that House drugged his former lovers husband and called the paramedics before he even arrived… It just seemed so funny and prick-ish and just perfect for Greg House (Hugh Laurie, who hath erased the mockery of his abilities that was his role in the Stuart Little movies were).

My older brother walks in on me to see why I am laughing so hard, and once i explained to him his face lit up a bit and he started relating to me how he loves the show… and so do his friends who call him House when they see him….

Mike’s always been weird in one way or another and I started thinking about the comparison between him and Greg House. House is distant, he’s bitingly sarcastic, shrewd, genius, cold… Mike is… Well, Mike is all of those things, except he’ll smile more often than House, he’ll joke more often than House (for the good of humor, not out of sarcastic desire).

Mike IS Greg House.

I’ve known women who’ve wanted to grab the mystery for themselves with Mike. You can’t quite imagine women wanting House but the mystery about him is there…. Helping to drive Dr. Cameron unsuccessfully towards him.

It’s odd, first my brother happens to look like David Duchovney… Now he happens to be like Greg House. What’s next? He starts making as much money as (insert movie star here)?

If there’s one thing on my mind more often lately, it’s gettign a dog… My younger brother went and got himself a great Dane puppy, my family hasn’t really had an active dog since Brownie passed a few years ago. Honey — god bless her, was a sloth who just loved to eat and didn’t do much besides sun herself outside.

Under Jenna’s influence, I’m interested in getting a Whippet but my sources are non existent. I’m not looking for a champion but I’m not looking for a mutt either… I’m also not looking for an over-physical dog tha will jump all over me and knock me around without knowing (thus why I haven’t gone after a pitbull).

I got nostalgic yesterday a bit not just because of where I was and who I was with, but also someoen I ended up talking to via email….

Eric Rosell, one of my best friends growing up – the kid aroudn the corner – got married in a small ceremony at a local church. It was the first time I had seen his parents in a few months, the first time I had seen his brother in a few years and the first time I had seen his sister in more years. It was amazing I was attending Eric’s wedding, surreal even. (sidenote – is it bad luck if a Catholic is married on teh day the Pope dies? I hope not)

I grew up playing or hanging out at Eric’s house. I was the one that was first notably enamoured with someone of the opposite sex… Or at least the first to make a big deal otu of love and romance and stuff like that. This, that and the other thing – I saw my childhood before me — even as it disappeared further.

The nostalgia didn’t end there as I heard from Danae – the girl who live ddownt eh block for a time who I was flipped out for. I had sent her an email wishing her a happy birthday — strange how sometimes you feel like it’s not yoru place to say soemthing like that and yet you have no problem with doing so with other people who are almost complete strangers. She got to breaking me the news her grandmother – who lives down the block – had passed away at Christmas (which I wasn’t aware of) and other things. I remembered being smitten with the saphire-eyed girl who lived at the corner… I thought of the memory of the past – and the awkwardness and malignance the relationship had in general.

But of all negatives in the past – they’ve been forgiven. If not forgotten by me.

Nice to have an old friend drop me a line — Robert, thanks for showing up man….

It was not so nice, however, to discover that my former love and my bane at the same time has gone the way to digital tumbleweeds, so to speak. Beatlelyrics.com is now a spammer site… Apple Corp LTD couldn’t be bothere dto renew a domain name and now a spammer owns it. Nice, fellas. You guys suck so much when it comes to business, it’s not even funny.

You know, last year I played the scorned and jaded lover… Last year I wrote about how I hurt and how I felt used and blah blah blah. I was worshipping Bitter Singles Day and writing a tome to them (which I will not link to tonight becuase I feel sick :p ).

It’s funny the difference a year can make….

This year I am kissing strangers and joking around, in good spirits. This year I am waiting eagerly for that special someone who is my left hand. This year I feel complete. This year I’m in love once again.

This year is a different world and I am glad I returned to it.

That being said, I still must send out regards to the lonely out there — there is hope and it will hit… Just make sure you keep your morals high and don’t bend for a moment. Don’t fool yourself iwth false emotion. It’ll be surprising when you find them… It is for me.