Ah, the journal… Now if only I could start writing like a human being again. I’ve found out that I am typing mistakes more often and using incomplete sentences more often because I’ve been stuck on the T900 pager the last week and keeping things tied into my friends online through that.

There’s so much I can say here and so much I want to say – stuff still going on and stuff that I want to talk about to specific people but the time isn’t right.

My hospital stay started with a bang – well not really, it was more like an “Oh shit!” when I forced myself to look at the clock besides my bed and see that it was 6 Am. I was due at the hospital at 5:45… Crap. I jumped, got dressed and got the hell out of dodge… Didn’t get tied up in traffic and actually got to the Hospital before my scheduled operation time… Not just that, was only a few minutes late going into the OR.

Was it scary? Going under the knife is always scary but it wasn’t scary like last year. There was something still sitting with me that was scarier and I was trying to accept things as moving on because of it. O course, waking up and having a mask put on me again didn’t make me feel comfortable either but then again – blacking out and waking up in post-op was about what I expected next.

Though I did dream. Of what, I don’t recall, but I am certain I dreamt this time I was under. I don’t usually dream. Last time I dreamt anything, it was of green clouds during my first operation.

ANYWAY, I wake up in the Post-op/recovery center and I’m watching the clock, of all things, because I was hoping to catch someone on a TV Talk show at 12:30. Of course it’s around 2 at the time and my priorities are out of whack but then again – I guess this also showed my confidence now. Oh sure, I was in pain, I was in a neck brace, and I had little movement in my legs (Muscle relaxants) but I was ready to start recovery.

I’ll tell more soon, other things take precedence now – like sleep.

It’s friday night and I’m sitting in my dorm room doing nothing. That’s really pathetic as some of you may know from going to college. Today has been eventful enough for me, though. I have a really sore throat, I’ve been sneezing, and I think I just need to slow the pace down a bit.

The day was rather uneventful. Once again, Spanish brought the hilight of my day. We talked a lot, so my throat started to hurt, but after class I had my first one-on-one encounter with a college guy. He was in my small group for the class period, and we were talking about different stuff in spanish..and when we’d have class next. “See ya on Tuesday!” he said. Yeah, so I felt good. Senior named Stew. Nice guy.

I’m not going to jump to conclusions and say that he’s in love with me or anything like that. He asked me about our Spanish Lab that he missed. He wanted to know what we did and if attendance was taken. That’s all that really matters to most students. Anyway, after last night, I think I’d come off really wishy-washy if I drooled all over this guy I hardly know. He was really nothing to drool over anyway.

Damn..I just sneezed again. This really sucks. I think I’m going to call it a night (at least for the journal entry thing) and go chat with some people online tonight. I’m trying to keep to myself in my dorm, so I don’t infect others. Plus a lot of people have left for the long weekend, and those left went out tonight. Not many around to converse with.

John should be back tomorrow, I believe..we’ll see. He says he’s doing well, and “site traffic will return to normal levels without your presence on the site.” Does that mean they’ve dropped or they’ve gone up, and will return to normal?? Why don’t you let me know and leave a comment or two, so I know how many people are actually reading this. It’d be really cool…plus it’d make John a little jealous I think…lol. Not that I want to, but I think he has a really nice site that not many get to see. So tell your friends! I look forward to hearing from you!

I am SO disturbed…

corrupt thy children! Worth 1000

He he he he… I don’t know what’s more disturbing – me laughing my ass off at these pictures or me forcing them on other people? .

So things aren’t much better for me as it stands right now – and I’m talking on many levels here when I say this. I’ve had ideas to write but I haven’t gotten them down on paper or on the journal. I called Doc Smith’s office today and what happened? I got told to fax him after telling his secretary I have no fax. Hmmphf. Figures, right?

I suggest to a friend that they write a satire article and submit it to Red Tide News because the one’s he has been posting on the Buccaneer usenet newsgroup have been funny as hell… And what happens? I get some asshole snipping at me because he believes no one goes to Red Tide News any more and that my firend in question woudl be better off posting on the Newsgroup where he would get “much more traffic”…. Right….

In other news… I’ve actually brought myself to venture back onto the venerable and everlasting FanBone. Not much though, seeing I am just out of it with sports. I am not in it with politics either even though everyone should think otherwise with that…

It was a year ago today that J.P. Fontana got some press today
And though he is pretty much out of style, he tries his best to raise a smile

I got up this morning and was reading the paper – Sunday edition of the St. Petersburg Times – like I normally would when it hit me that it was this Sunday last year that I got a little press over a situation that was going on with me and Apple Corp. LTD.

I’ve been making mention of it being a year later and they can’t quite believe it’s been a year since that happened. Hell, neither can I. I’m trying to think back a year ago and in a lot of ways I think I was better off then than I am now — I was scared but I was also determined to try to cause a ruckus over the whole thing. Scared — more because of surgery that was facing me than because of the whole fight. I was intimidated and I felt alone quite a good bit. I didn’t have the support of my family (note my other journal entries and any reference to my father and his lack-of-sticking-his-neck-out). I did have the support of my friends for the most part… And that meant a lot to me.

And the fans, there is no way in hell that i can forget the fans. I was just a faceless-name to some of them. I mean, you gotta figure unless you meet someone in person that the only way they can perceive you is in two dimensions… At the same time, they were the reason I was putting up a fight in the first place and having the positive feedback I was getting was the reason I battled on to just try to attract attention to the situation. How could I just give in? Countless fans across the Internet could be subjected to some of the Corporate Terrorism like I was subjected to… I mean, the RIAA is doing that just now – terrorizing the fans.

So here I sit, 365 days after the events that transpired to give me a name and yet I’m no farther down the road than I was then. Not more recognized (though I have had some friends tell me they have read my story or heard about my plight — Lou Fisher heard about it in Fishkill, New York — reading it in the paper last year or what not) and yet back down a path I wanted to venture last year when I was telling Jeanne Malmgren about my plight… No, that wasn’t where I decided I wanted to write again, it was just an event that inspired me.

So what’s my inspiration now?

I’ve got the Stonegauge on line and it’s been there since last July… It’s got a trickle of web traffic compared to Beatlelyrics.com — though LennonLad is still taking in some 90-150 visitors a day, and Abolish the Designated Hitter takes in 5-20 visitors at any given time — but I am still kicking on the web.

Yet the web isn’t my inspiration… That’s not what’s driving me right now – not web recognition… Though I’d like it… I’d like to be bigger than I though I was in my brief and glimmering 15 minutes of fame last year. That part of me still exists. In fact, I’m happy to report the angry, angst ridden son-of-a-bitch is still out there right now. I won’t say I want the world but damnit – I’m not sitting back and waiting for things. Sure, I’ve got problems in front of me. Yeah, I’ve got problems that are pinning my emotions, but fer Christ’s sake — if I have any say on the direction of where I go from here, I’ll tell you that you ain’t seen nothing yet. I’ve been hurt — I’ll keep trying. I’ve been put down — I’ll keep trying. I’ve been stopped — I’ll keep fighting.

Well, just as long as I control my fate. When it’s taken out of my hands (medical stuff) there’s not much I can do… But I’ll leave it up to the Fates to tie me down or set me free.

It’s now the 4th of August. The official date the above mentioned article was published… and this little rant is now published as well.

Last night I finally got a good night of sleep after tossing and turning all weekend and getting up early. Nice refreshing change back to the norm – me sleeping in….

I went downstairs and I read the newspapers like usual and one of the top stories in the local “North Pinellas Times” section of the St. Petersburg Times simply enraged me. I ought to find something normal to get pissed off about, because politics and business (especially here in Florida) will be the end of me…

You see, Wal-Mart is proposing a new Supercenter along the bank of Lake Tarpon, which is entirely ridiculous. Where the building would be is not more than 10 miles from another Supercenter, nor is it 2 miles from a current Wal-Mart location….

The story’s headline? “Wal-Mart proposal includes traffic signal”…

You mean to tell me that a building that 1) adds to sprawl in North Pinellas, 2) hurts the environment, 3) Paves over a wooded RV Park and D) is useless, should make me feel more comfortable because they would add a TRAFFIC SIGNAL at their entrance point? Give me an f’n break!

I ended up going all out this morning over this – I emailed the stories writer with a complaint that he did not include the information that the proposed store rests only a few thousand feet from another Wal-Mart. I also went out and emailed my County Commissioners expressing displeasure over the proposal which now rests in their hands:

Commissioners:

My name is John Fontana and I’m a Pinellas County resident in North
Pinellas County. What I read in the newspaper today disturbed me and it
also made mention that the County Commission controlled the outcome of this
planned development – so I am emailing you in order to voice my displeasure
and concerns about what has been proposed.

Walk Mart Corporation and Wilder Corp development have proposed a
Supercenter to be built adjacent to Lake Tarpon and U.S. 19 south of
Klosterman Road. While Wilder Corp argues about how the region suffers from
a lack of shopping (which has been their public argument since attempting to
build a Target and Lowe’s Home Improvement center on the property), it does
not seem to take into consideration why people oppose it and why residents
do not like the proposed.

For starters, Wal-Mart has both a Supercenter and a standard Wal-Mart store
within driving distance of the proposed location. It is not a problem for
any resident to drive from Klosterman or points around the area to either
Alderman Road or Oldsmar where the locations of Wal-Mart’s stores are. The
proposed construction also adds more apartments to an already over-saturated
market here in North Pinellas. Innisbrook Resort gutted it’s property to
add hundreds of apartments within the last 5 years, and other Apartment
options surround the area…. Adding a new set of apartments would not just
drive down opposing apartment complexes value, but just continue to add
clutter to the sprawling North Pinellas area.

Another problem with this proposal is environmental impact. Wilder Corp’s
plans would gut it’s wooded RV park and pave over the spot… It would also
disturb the Lake Tarpon ecosystem due to rain run-off that would end up in
the lake from the parking from both the proposed Wal-Mart and also the
proposed apartment’s.

What is to become of the Wal-Mart that is currently located at Alderman Road
and U.S. 19? Would it be vacated and left to be an empty and ugly “box”?
Don’t we already have enough of these in the Bay Area and Pinellas County by
carpet-bagging developers? How much development are we going to allow to
tarnish Lake Tarpon? How many green-spots in Pinellas County are left to be
paved over with additional suburban sprawl? Is Wilder Corp’s vow to pay for
a traffic signal at US 19 and Cypress Pointe supposed to put my mind at ease
that my tax-payer dollars will not be spent on this? If that is the case,
it doesn’t. This development should be stopped in it’s tracks. There are
other uses for the property that are more sound than the current proposal.

That was sent to four of seven County Commissioners… I only pray they don’t just file this away and ignore the complaint.

I’m so sick of backing up and giving ground to large, ominous corporations…. I’ve done it with Sony and Apple Corp LTD…. I’ve bowed to the Corporate structure by getting a minimal job with Target Corp…. What’s next? I have to name my first born Microsoft Fontana in order to get to use Windows XP 2.0? Or have UPC codes tattooed to my skin in order to be able to purchase items from a specific company? Will I have to move because someone wants to build a gas station on my property and the County uses some hidden law to evict me? I want to fight it, I want to lobby against it, I want to protest it… And yet I can’t find many like-minded people near me.

One thing I am proud of with this site is being able to come on here and leave one rant each time I leave a journal entry. For those of you still reading my journal you’ll know I was bummed out after the Beatle Lyrics fallout and didn’t quite know what I would do with the web space at hand. I did turn it into your venerable Stonegauge… but there’s still more that can be covered in the future and I hope I can do that….

Anyway, lets get to the rant now shall we? :smile

You hear me complain politics all the time, at times you hear me moan about Tampa and/or Tampa Bay… If I haven’t, well you should be thankful. One thing that irked me the other day while thinking about stuff is the biggest special-interest group in the area. It’s not a company, it’s not a person… It’s a roadway.

US 19 is the worst 30 mile stretch of roadway in Florida and arguably the US. It’s a volume of 80 thousand + cars and trucks a day driving in stop-and-go conditions from the county line to the tip of Pinellas County. Half the people who drive it are trying to commute south, the other half are trying to make minor neighborhood trips.

Why is US 19 a special interest group? The Businesses along it….. Commissioners of Pinellas County do a lot of planning specifically for businesses that are along the corridor. The roadway would be best if it was a freeway with limited access…..

But that would not make the businesses or the consumers happy, now would it?

So Pinellas County gets money from the state, and the National Government in order to “improve” the roadway with minor bits of glam – an overpass here, sidewalks there, streetlights. It still never helps the problems that pop up – the Highway cannot have open access like it does, Pedestrian Overpasses are needed, more flyovers in both directions to help traffic flow….

But why would they do THAT? It wouldn’t help businesses directly. It wouldn’t fill coffers at Election time. It’s political bullshit I’ve been viewing for the past 5 years from a political level and it sucks.

Median breaks, a continuous right hand turn lane, more traffic lights… It’s just adding to the problems while avoiding the solutions.

I had a moment of realization over a song lyric just a short while ago. This happens to me once in a while when I think about some songs I know or I have heard. You think about the lyrics and sing the lyrics but you don’t always think of the story behind the lyrics or what they mean.

For example, I Just Called To Say I Love You by Stevie Wonder doesn’t say much more than the lack of a special occasion… That’s the entire point of the song when you think about it. He wasn’t calling to talk to someone because it was Halloween, because it was New Years Day or a “Wedding Saturday within the month of June,” he was just calling to profess his love for no reason at all.

Now, the song that got to me is something I heard when it originally came out in 1992. One by U2. Now, this song I have been nuts about since late early February when I was trying to learn the song SPECIFICALLY because people thought it would be in the Super Bowl half time show as a tribute. I’ve been singing the song on and off and sometimes just thinking about the lyrics and trying to figure out what Paul Hewson was talking about (Paul, FYI, is Bono).

Is it getting better
Or do you feel the same?
Will it make it easier on you now?
You’ve got someone to blame

You say,
One Love
One Life
When It’s One Need
In the Night
One Love
We Get to share it
Leaves you baby,
If you don’t care for it

Did I disappoint you
Or leave a bad taste in your mouth
You act like you’ve never had love
And you want me to go without

Well it’s
Too late
Tonight
To drag the past back out into the light
We’re One
But we’re not the same
We get to Carry each other
Carry each other
One

Now I could keep going and mention all the lyrics to the site but if my recollection serves me right, I am a webmaster of a BEATLES Lyrics site (when people don’t litigate me, I mean :-p ). The point to what I am talking about is what does this song mean… What does ONE Mean?

First off, obviously it’s about a relationship. It isn’t however, a relationship that has broken up. It’s still ongoing. It seems as if the person talking is trying to talk up their relationship — how both sides are committed to it. He may have pryed a little too deep at one point (Did I ask too much/more than a lot ) and the other side did not take it well because of this. The other side is a bit reserved and he’s laying down the fact that if they are in love — they’re supposed to be one, try to function as one even though they aren’t the same. Sure they hurt each other but they’ll do it again — that’s what tends to happen in love anyway. Someone gets hurt over something, even if it’s not something. I think he is also trying to confess that what went down was not a fatal mistake…

Honestly, only Bono can truly know what the song means… I see this story as what is going on in the song… It definitely has little to do with the 3 seperate videos that were released for One ( a) Bono in the bar, shots of a woman, shots of U2; B) U2 performing, Bono sitting on a couch and singing, all band members appearing in drag, cars driving through Scotland; C) The lone Buffalo roaming the terrain ).

“What the hell brought this on John?”
Nothing to be honest. I just get to thinking on a tangent like this all the time. Something of absolutely no substance coming to mind. It’s one of my charming personality traits

I’ve been on FanHome a lot the last day… I’m trying to help boost the amount of traffic on the Football section of the site (seeing it is Training Camp time in the NFL and the season will start soon). For those of you who have never been to FanHome, first off — I administrate on the site. Second off, it’s a sports message board of some noteriety on the net. It should reach 40 thousand registered members sometime tonight. It’s definitely worth a look if you are into sports.

I updated the site a bit here and there. I now have 3 separate email addresses for all 3 sections of the site which is a big plus. I doubt anyone sends me an email from here but all the same if you need to — webmaster@stoengauge.com will do the job for ya.

I’m back…

After getting caught up at home (read – unwound, read the paper, got bored to shit, etc) I’m here giving you the update on what went down during my four day trek through Jim Morrison’s City of Light (or City of Night, take your pick).

First and foremost, the flight to LA was good – we had pretty good conditions and we also had a basically empty plane that made a stop over in Albuquerque, New Mexico before going on to LA. There was, however, a rather gross incident on this flight I would rather forget – a kid sitting across the aisle either spilled a drink or wet his pants, he proceeded to stand up on his seat and disrobe all the way to his bare ass. Now, nudity is pretty cool in some lights, but I do not want to look at a child’s penis, nor do I think they should be allowed to get naked on the plane in plain view of everyone else…

What he didn’t do, and I’m glad he didn’t, was run up and down the aisle screaming “Nekkid time! Nekkid time!”

Anyway, on the second leg of the flight — I enjoyed a soft drink instead of the bottled water which I had been drinking for most of the flight. I also had my father repeatedly flip me the bird. Gee, thanks Dad.

When we got to LA, everything was great up until we got near St. Vincent Medical Center – traffic was snarled and we were frustrated as hell by it, not only that but we went to the local grocery store to pick up some things for our stay and we found out that there had been a MAJOR accident involving buried utilities. Some of the street lights on the way had been out, the stores themselves were shut, there was police tape from here to San Bernardino and we basically had to go back empty handed.

Anything else of worth on that trip? No really, the settings of my ABI were changed and they’re a bit fuckered at this point. I’ll get used to it of course but it will take a while. I also wrote a new poem that I’ll probably put on the site soon enough, but I want to go about doing some web work and see if I can get the new design for this page (yes kiddies, new design — maybe) together.